Kendra is artistically gifted, and when she allows the art to flow the images are harsh and striking representations of her abuse. Their sessions provide a safe place for memories and emotions. Her therapist, Carolyn, is exceedingly kind, patient, and understanding. Kendra attempts to cope with this personal horror through two things: therapy, and her artwork. She fears she'll be killed if she remembers her abuser's identity, and especially if she reveals that identity to someone else. Lately, she has felt someone following her, and now threatening notes and "gifts" are appearing in her locker and bookbag. Flashes of a man's hairy hands clutching her, his voice telling her he will kill her if she tells haunt her, and she is sure she could remember the identity of her abuser if she tried, but she is too afraid to allow herself that knowledge. Summary: Kendra cuts herself to ease the terrifying fear that overwhelms her as she tries to cope with memories of the sexual abuse she endured for years. I don't usually read this type of book but it was Amazon's free download of the day, so I gave it a shot.
Too often, the people around me have a hard time understanding what I'm going through - from now on, I'll recommend this book to them and let it show them.
So I have to give the author kudos - she did something very rare and I hope this book helps other kids who find themselves in a similar situation. And I love that ending because it gives hope to people like me. She still has good days and bad days, but she's going to get through them because she's a survivor. She still has problems on the road ahead of her. The author doesn't gloss over the pain and, while things do end on a more positive note, I wasn't given the impression that Kendra's life will just be A-okay now. They try to gloss over the bad parts and make everything hunky-dory at the end.
And, very often, I find that the fictional books aren't very realistic. I don't talk about it very often because I have problems discussing these topics, but I do read a lot of writing about both subjects. Truth be told, I stopped cutting because I found out that one of my friends cut as well - and he scared me into turning the situation into something that really did help me cope without risking my life). It allows me to take something that makes me feel awful and turn it into art, but that doesn't always sit well with everyone else. I don't hide the fact that I'm a rape victim - or that I used to be a self-mutilator (still am, depending on who you are and how you define SM - I cope now with tattoos and body piercing because it's safer than slashing up my arms or legs.
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